If I Owned a Midget (Midget Named Gordo) - Benefit

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If I Owned a Midget (Midget Named Gordo) Lyrics

(intro)
i picked up this midget you know he's very very well dressed
italian suit good looking with a beautiful tall blond
is it a- a lady midget
no the guy was a midget the blond was a lady
oh the- i get it
those midgets are funny hahaha sometimes i'd like to hold a midget
i mean they're funny
they always wanna sit in the front seat- word
(verse 1)
life's got me mad
but if i had a midget i'd be glad
to watch him jump around on my nintendo powerpad
he'd have a big head short legs and long torso
the name that i give my pet midget is little gordo
i'd teach him tricks like backflips and side kicks
when company came over he'd perform and get tips
while i'm eatin at night, in the kitchen he'd be able
to get the food scraps that i threw under the table
if my midget was ever mad and acted enraged
then i'd take him to the bathroom and put him in his cage
but if he kept acting up and really made me sick
i'd hang him upside down and poke him with a stick
little gordo would be good most of the time though
he'd like to wear a helmet and run around yelling kaiyo
i'd take him for walks in the park on the weekends
and if he saw other midgets he'd say can we be friends
he'd only need a 3 foot coffin when he was dead
and he'd be in the guiness book for the world's biggest head
what a funny little fellow, but don't call him a shrimp
or he'll attack your leg cause gordos a tough gimp
he'd have a pogo ball that he'd bounce on for hours
and dirty little fathead gordo would'nt take showers
when halloween came, he wouldn't be a chump
Gettin all the candy goin round as a tree stump
(scratching/chorus)
midget is a midget
midget mi-mi-mi-mi-midget
midget is a midget
hey you guys- word
midget is a midget
midget mi-mi-mi-mi-midget
midget (wo-wo-wo-wo-word) is a midget
like a midget in a urinal, i was gonna have to stay on my toes
(verse 2)
sometimes my friends would chase gordo with a gun
it be fun
because midgets wobble when they run
they're so close to the ground and so easy to kick
they're so slow in the head and so easy to trick
gordo could do somersaults his special thing
at the fair i would make him enter mudwrestling
sometimes he'd wear stilts and pretend to be tall
then i'd kick him over- and then i'd laugh at him fall
silly little gordo, just be yourself
i'd put wood on his head, and he'd just be a shelf
he'd do funny little dances but that's irrelevant
at the beach gordo got attacked by pelicans
he had a girlfriend once, but she was an ogre
it didn't last long cause he couldn't fuck her sober
gordo had a problem, gordo wet the bed
so i'd make him wear diapers on his ass and his head
he'd have to clean up his own cage himself
and if he lost a little weight he'd be a keebler elf
he'd really be something, my mangled little munchkin
plus his head would be larger then any big pumpkin
this perfect little fool would make a perfect footstool
sometimes i'd kick him in his head and say 'bitch be cool'
i'd have a great life, i'd be happy i know
if i only owned a little pet midget named gordo
(scratching/chorus)

Lyrics provided by LyricsEver.com
There are four artists with this name:

1) Benefit - underground rapper. Making his mark with winning the Napster competition, his entry "Power To The People And The Beats", Benefit, still highly unknown, is a highly talented young MC from Florida.
He is most famous for his track "Warp to World 6-9" also known as "Super Mario Bros. Freestyle", in which he raps about Super Mario's adventure in his video games as a quest to get the Princess's "goods".

With his only album release to date being B.E.N.E.F.I.T., watch out for any new releases. His second single from this album was "If I Had A Midget".



2) Duo Benefit are Lucy Harrison and Judy Hulme who live together in a flat in Camden, London. Born in 1979, they have been friends since the age of 10, and went to the same performing arts school together.

The girls haven't had any chart success in the UK, but their first single, "Sex Sells" was released in the Lebanon in 2002, and spent 6 weeks at #1. Also in Russia and Ukraine, the single had a huge success, a strong rotation and good position in the charts. The follow up single "What's It Gonna Be" (is a Latino-tinged track, which reminds a little of something that Geri Halliwell would do) achieved the same feat later that year. On top of this, the girls performed at a few music festivals in the Middle East, and they have the distinction of being the first western group to ever perform live in Syria.

The girls had problems with their UK record company Edel. Both singles were promoed in the UK, but neither got a proper release. Shame the girls never got the proper chance to try to repeat their foreign success in their homeland...


3) Benefit is a hardcore band from Zagreb, Croatia. The band is 5 piece made and kicking it since summer of 2010.

4) Benefit - Rock band from Czech Republic, formed in 70´s and still running ! Read more on Last.fm. User-contributed text is available under the Creative Commons By-SA License; additional terms may apply.

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