F**k Everything - Jon Lajoie

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Embed: I say "bitch I don't give a fuck"
She said "I can't process your order if you don't pick a size"
I said "fine, I'll take a large, but I still don't give a fuck, alright?"
Don't give a fuck about beverage size options motherfucker
And I don't give a fuck about liquids either
They're all wet and shit and tend to spill all over the place
Like human semen when I get it all over my face
I'm not gay, I just don't give a fuck about straight sex

And fuck my dick, I'll pee and cum out of my mouth instead.
Fuck biological functions, fuck the human body
I prefer the body of a bat with the head of a coyote
I call myself batyote and I fight crime at night
I know its similar to batman but motherfuck copyright
I plagiarize all the time, I do it everyday
Cause I'm on the right track baby, I was born this way

And fuck birth, entering the world of space & time is a bitch
Searching for purpose in the random universe sucks dick
Is it deterministic or am I free to choose my way
Did I choose to not give a fuck about ice cube trays
If I want ice I'll go to the fucking corner store and buy a bag
Filling you up and waiting for the water to freeze is a motherfucking drag
You know what? Fuck the word fuck, I don't need to use it
I'll replace it with the word chainsaw for this (I don't a give a chainsaw...)
About anything, chainsaw everyone and chainsaw everything, what
(I don't give a chainsaw...)
I literally don't give a chainsaw about anything

If there was a contest to see who doesn't give a fuck the most
I wouldn't win cause I don't give a fuck about winning yo
I don't even give a fuck about not giving a fuck,
so I do give a fuck... wait, what?

(I give a fuck...)
About everything, I love everyone and care about everything
(I give a fuck...)
I literally care about every motherfucking thingLyrics provided by TANCODEhttp://lyricsever.com/" readonly=""/>

F**k Everything Lyrics

Yo. All the rappers claim to not give a fuck.
Well step aside bitches, cause I give the lowest amount of fuck humanly possible.

What?!

(I don't a give a fuck...)
About anything, fuck everyone and fuck everything, what
(I don't give a fuck...)
I literally don't give a fuck about anything

I don't give a fuck about motherfuckin' anything
People care about shit, I say fuck everything
Fuck you, fuck me, fuck the sky, fuck trees, fuck the sun
I don't need heat or Vitamin D!

And fuck toasters, I don't need to cook my bread
And fuck coasters, I use a little plate instead
And fuck roosters, with their useless cockadoodledoo
We invented alarm clocks. We no longer need you

Don't give a fuck about chairs. I prefer to stand
And fuck air conditioners - I got a ceiling fan
And fuck the the movie the fan, starring Wesley Snipes
Demolition man's the only Snipes movie i liked
And fuck liking shit. I don't even like the stuff that I like
Don't give a fuck about not liking all the shit I don't like
Like tissues. Fuck them! I blow my nose on the couch

And fuck my nostrils and my sense of smell, I breathe through my mouth
Don't give a fuck about seeing bitch, fuck my eyes
Fuck visual perception yo, I'd rather be blind
Fuck time, seconds are too short and minutes are a joke
And hours are way too long, they should be half an hour at most
And fuck coasts, who gives a fuck about where water meets land
And fuck boats, just because you float you think you're so fucking bad
And fuck jokes, I don't need to be funny all the time
My dog has a tumor and he's probably gonna die, but...

(I don't a give a fuck...)
About anything, fuck everyone and fuck everything, what
(I don't give a fuck...)
I literally don't give a fuck about anything

Walked into a coffee shop and ordered a cup
The girl says "small, medium, large?"
I say "bitch I don't give a fuck"
She said "I can't process your order if you don't pick a size"
I said "fine, I'll take a large, but I still don't give a fuck, alright?"
Don't give a fuck about beverage size options motherfucker
And I don't give a fuck about liquids either
They're all wet and shit and tend to spill all over the place
Like human semen when I get it all over my face
I'm not gay, I just don't give a fuck about straight sex

And fuck my dick, I'll pee and cum out of my mouth instead.
Fuck biological functions, fuck the human body
I prefer the body of a bat with the head of a coyote
I call myself batyote and I fight crime at night
I know its similar to batman but motherfuck copyright
I plagiarize all the time, I do it everyday
Cause I'm on the right track baby, I was born this way

And fuck birth, entering the world of space & time is a bitch
Searching for purpose in the random universe sucks dick
Is it deterministic or am I free to choose my way
Did I choose to not give a fuck about ice cube trays
If I want ice I'll go to the fucking corner store and buy a bag
Filling you up and waiting for the water to freeze is a motherfucking drag
You know what? Fuck the word fuck, I don't need to use it
I'll replace it with the word chainsaw for this (I don't a give a chainsaw...)
About anything, chainsaw everyone and chainsaw everything, what
(I don't give a chainsaw...)
I literally don't give a chainsaw about anything

If there was a contest to see who doesn't give a fuck the most
I wouldn't win cause I don't give a fuck about winning yo
I don't even give a fuck about not giving a fuck,
so I do give a fuck... wait, what?

(I give a fuck...)
About everything, I love everyone and care about everything
(I give a fuck...)
I literally care about every motherfucking thing

Lyrics provided by LyricsEver.com
Jon Lajoie, born and raised in Montreal, Canada, is the third in a family of nine children. He graduated from Dawson College’s theatre/ninja assassin program in 2001, and immediately started booking assassination work, incidentally putting his acting career on the back burner. Between 2001 and 2007 Jon Lajoie assassinated (in a ninja-like fashion) an estimated 40 000 people, and an estimated 9000 fish (in early 2004 demand for assassination was low, so for 3 months, he held a part-time job as a fisherman).

In June of 2007, he decided to start making videos and posting them on his YouTube-channel. The videos were so well received that he put “assassinating people in a ninja-like fashion” on hold, and began getting drunk all the time. A few months later he decided to only get drunk once in a while and to restart making videos.

in 2010, Jon got lost and wandered on to a Hollywood television set. People assumed he was supposed to be there. They started calling him Taco, and he started responding to the name. He hasn't left the set since. No one really knows if he's aware that he's on a TV show.

Lajoie has released 2 studio albums and 8 singles.
2009 - You Want Some of This?
2010 - I Kill People
2011 - Very Super Famous, The Best Song, F**k Everything, WTF Collective 3.
2012 - Broken-Hearted, The Best Christmas Song
2013 - Started as a Baby Read more on Last.fm. User-contributed text is available under the Creative Commons By-SA License; additional terms may apply.

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Jon Lajoie